To me, it's been seeming a lot like she may have Dementia like my grandpa but maybe more severe since she's been extremely delusional. While my mom was there last weekend, it was only her and my grandparents in the house but my grandpa was in his room mumbling to himself and my grandma started freaking out saying, "who's in the room with Freddie? Who's he talking to? Is it those girls again?" My mom just reminded her that they were the only ones in the house and she dropped it...for a little while. My grandparents can't be left in the same room for long periods of time now since all my grandmother does is hurl rude and hurtful words and names towards my grandfather.
The insults also go to others and not just my grandpa. She's yelled and insulted other people in my family also. She even got after my brother for trying to help her when she fell in the bathroom on Saturday. He went to help get her up and she told him "No I don't want your help. You don't know what your doing. Don't touch me" and things like that. And it really did hurt his feelings too.
Clearly because she is still on the whole "cheating husband" thing, it's been causing me to do more research on strokes and the effects on the brain. I know strokes can effect the left side of the body and cause paralysis on one side of the body but what else could strokes do to the human brain?
During my search I found some things on EMedicine Health about Stroke Related Dementia. Depending on which parts of the brain that is damaged, determines exactly what symptoms that will occur. Paralysis, loss of bowel control, along with cognitive mental functions, judgement, memory, thinking, organization, and reasoning are all on the symptoms list (Stroke Related Dementia). The statistics even state that a stroke survivor is about nine times more likely to develop dementia then non stroke havers. Also, that about one in four people start to show dementia symptoms within one year of the stroke.
With just this little bit of information it can help answer my question about the likeliness of my grandmother's delusions being formed from the stroke and also even being signs of a more severe form of dementia than what my grandpa has. Her stroke could've damaged the part of the brain that does the reasoning, hard thinking and judgement explaining her sudden irrational paranoia of my grandfather's faithfulness. Maybe if my family got more into researching her symptoms we could come to a conclusion and even have some evidence to show the doctors so they can help with her problems. They don't see it because whenever she goes into the doctors office she's pretty much on her best behavior so they don't see or hear the nasty things she says or thinks that is going on in her house.
I'm just really ready to get down to the bottom of it once and for all. I know my grandma and she's not this cruel person that either the stroke, meds, or depression has turned her into. She's always been one of the sweetest people i've ever known and to see her either angry, mean, or in tears is just not okay with me. I just feel like right now no one knows what to do. We're all just standing around hoping Grandma will come back to us. The real her. I just really hope it's not too late and that somehow, someway, we can get her back.
References:
"Stroke-Related Dementia," EMedicine Health. Web MD,Inc: 2012.<http://www.emedicinehealth.com/stroke-related_dementia/article_em.htm>
Here's something I've never shared before, but it relates to this topic, and you've been so honest so I think it's good that your readers share their stories with you, too.
ReplyDeleteMy grandfather had dementia/senility. It could have been due to smoking-related emphysema, lots of shell bombardments from the Battle of the Bulge in WW2, or his work as a painter (the fumes). We really don't know.
My grandparents moved in with my mother when they were in their late 60s. Nowadays we'd think that was really young, but my grandfather was worn-out from a physical life and all those chemicals. He had dementia, and it snuck up on him. The worst was that when I was home from college (the age you are now), I would go and sometimes sleep right outside his bedroom on a couch in the living room so that my mom (a nurse) and my grandmother would finally get some rest. All night he would moan and cry for my grandmother, who took care of him most of the day. My mom took evenings and weekends, and they were both exhausted.
This disease kills families. My mom aged years over months, and my grandmother wasn't ever the same. My grandfather admitted to affairs (we have no idea if he really had them or if they were just dreams), and the worst was his crying (at 70!) for ice cream. All night long.
The descent of a loved one into dementia is never easy. Your post brought up a lot about my own family's struggles with this disease. I just want you to know: You're not alone. I know that's cold comfort. But the more research you do and the more you can share with your mom and extended family, including your grandparents, the better decision makers you will be in the long run.
Your details and connections here to the story are really powerful.